Blueprint Design Wars

‘I don’t see it,’ I frowned, staring at the blueprints Jai had just put in front of me. ‘Where is the sink going?’

‘Here!’ he said, clearly frustrated, jabbing his finger at a rectangle I had absolutely assumed was the fridge.’

‘What?’ I said, frown deepening. ‘Honey, I’m so confused.’

‘Just trust me!’ he said. ‘It’ll be the kitchen of your dreams!’

‘I already have the kitchen of my dreams,’ I said slowly. ‘It’s this one. We’re currently sitting in the kitchen of my dreams.’

‘You complain about it all the time!’ he laughed, rolling up the plans.

‘Well, little gripes, yeah, but I’ve never had an issue with where the sink is.’

‘Babe, trust me,’ he said soothingly. ‘This is gonna be great. I’m gonna find the best company available for kitchen renovations. Melbourne is huge, there’ll be plenty to choose from!’

‘Did you say “my kitchen renovation”,’ I repeated. ‘What’s that about?’

‘Well, I just meant, like the plans that I drew up,’ he said nervously. ‘Like it’s my vision, y’know?’

‘Fine,’ I said, plastering a smile on my face and nodding. ‘In that case – I want to redo the bathroom.’

‘What’s that now?’

‘If you get to take a stab at the kitchen,’ I shrugged, ‘I want to put my stamp on the bathroom. I’m thinking… floral.’

‘Ha-ha, Lexie,’ he nervously giggled. ‘Very funny.’

‘What’s funny?’

‘You’re not being serious? You know nothing about premium bathroom design,’ he scoffed.

‘How hard can it be?’ I shrugged. ‘Draw a few rectangles on a blueprint that is, by the way, not even blue—’

‘It’s a standard complaint,’ he acknowledged.

‘—and then when your partner expresses confusion, roll it up and pat them on the head condescendingly.’

‘In my defence, I only metaphorically did that,’ he said.

‘So,’ I clapped my hands together, ignoring him. ‘Where should I start?’

He sighed and began to unroll the blueprints.

‘Would you like to start with the sink?’

‘Yes please,’ I smiled up at him.


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